Wait for it

Wait for the drum roll

Watch for the sound of the horns

Woodwinds responding

Will the strings respond?

Will the conductor

Wave his button

Will it have meaning?

Today

This point in time

Was not

The best day

Maybe not the worst

But not the best

A few incidents were nice

Comforting

Even special

But by enlarge

The day

Well

Sucked!

‘Tis winter now

The snow and cold

Invade my bones

Invade my soul

I am a creature

Of heat

Of warmth

Of fair weather

But fate

Chance

And just plain

Poor planning

Has placed me

In a spot

A place

A time

Where weather

Changes

Is seasonal

And for a certain time of the year

Just too dang cold

Despite all the problems

Despite all the pain

Despite all the all…

I find myself in a

Gentle place

Age

And putting up with

All the putting up with

Has taught me to

Disconnect

If I had learned that

Days/months/years ago

I would not have

Had to disconnect

Now

Life is what it is

From the womb

We have no promise of happiness

From the womb

We have no promise of wealth

From the womb

We have no promise of long life

From the womb

We are what we are

We take and give and receive what

We didn’t want

Life is what it is

It sucks

But then

Is there really anything else

A dank

Dreary

Damp

Late fall day

It bothers

Me more

As I get older

Then it once did

But all of the pain

Is not

Simply

Physical

I struggle

With a pain

That

Seeks to overwhelm me

It won’t

Been there

Survived

That

But

This time

Still need

To overcome

I will not do that again

I will never ask again

It’s your loss not mine

Your mistake

Not mine

If you fail to see that

Then your fault

Not mine

But I forgive

I tried to re-connect

And you acted like the error

Was all mine

Okay

I accept the fault

Even if I know the fault is

Yours

I will walk away

With no regrets

But it is your loss

Not mine

I sit here

Waiting

Waiting for the

Purpose of why

I’m here

Why I exist

To reveal

Itself

But I fear that

It has

Come and gone

And I failed to

Recognize

The

Event

Allow me to be

What I am

If not then I will

Hunt you down with dogs

Accept me

And I will accept you

Reject me

And watch your back